ACID

I remember the heat, the relentless blaze,
of a fierce sun, in a cloudless sky,
penetrating into my head, but it was cool.
I was in the middle of a savannah,
somewhere in Africa.
The hard, grey bark of a leafless acacia
stood defiant against the blue horizon
and the fine red dust wafted up
into my nostrils and made it hard to breathe.
But I just spun around, in ecstasy,
and the dust turned into an Alpine fragrance…
I was in a meadow
dotted with wonderful white and yellow flowers,
adorned by the gentle song of a blackcap,
and the joyous chatter of some gold finches.
A mountain stream trickled down sounding like
a gentle, melodic rap on the cymbals.
I was enraptured, enwrapped in and within these wonderful sounds,
perfumes, and those splendrous views.
The sounds and the colours had captured me,
it was blue, dark, then indigo and mauve, purple and brown,
and I will never forget the orange hue,
which emerged from within my stomach as I sung
and floated up into the ether
as I spun around again and again.
Then I was inside a musical kaleidoscope.
One shake and the multi-coloured firmament would be on my head,
in my head, and the rattle and hum would be unbearable.
The music in my ears was louder, harsher
and threatening.
I spun round again, in fear,
because the sky had turned black.
All at once the white and yellow flowers became eyes in the indigo grass – the eyes of a million serpents.
I was back in the savannah,
surrounded by snakes and hyenas,
drivelling at the mouth,
encircling me.
I had no choice but to give in
and give in, I did.
I threw myself onto the floor and that was my saviour.
I went through the floor and was eaten up.
Not by wild dogs but by the earth.
Yet below the ground I could breath.
It was so black I could see myself in the reflection of the darkness.
I saw myself eating – earth.
There was nothing I could do.
My mouth opened and I was eating dirt.
It went up my nose, into my ears and my eyes.
Now I was blind but as this whole world was black then,
in my blindness, I could see.
I knew I was only just below the surface,
although further down I had never sunk, before.
So I reached out, and up.
My arm propelled my hand through the mass of soil
until it got to the top, and was free!
I pulled with all my might because,
below the surface,
was hell, or at least as close as you can get.
So I wrenched my whole body upwards
and made the final break through.
It was night time.
Suddenly I was standing on the ground.
Earth poured out of my nostrils
and my mouth, and from me eyes,
which I opened.
Or did I?
Then why could I not see?
The heavens were jet black –
not a single star and no lunar light.
And the black air was in my hair,
down my back,
and I shivered.
I looked down and saw the only source of light.
There, on the floor, was a body, a corpse.
Running from that poor souls mouth
was a lather of saliva, and vomit.
Dark eyes of terror stared at me
with an inquisitive look.
All over the body there were gouged out wounds,
bloody and vile, full of teeth marks from rampant dogs.
Maggots already permeated through the limbs.
I looked down in sympathy, and terror.
And, as I did, a white, frothy liquid oozed out of my mouth
and slowly trickled down on to the face of the corpse
and I bent down, slowly, in slow motion, to make it stop
but I couldn’t.
And neither could I stop my own motion.
I could not stop this slow stooping downwards,
getting ever closer to the limp, dead body on the floor.
The more I tried to recoil back,
the more relentless was the slow movement down.
And then I saw it was inevitable,
as my limbs merged into hers,
and her body into mine.
At last our two heads looked at each other
and I saw it was me.
I screamed, and I shouted
but the whole, damned Universe had turned black.
The silence was loud and my screams were unheard.
I screamed and I screamed and no sound came from my mouth,
just vomit, salty vomit, mixed with my tears.
That’s all I can remember, shit man, give me another shot.

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